Dentist Rapport

Every Christmas break
And Fourth of July weekend
I visit the dentist
For the annual checkup
He labels me a mouth breather
But in a good way
And insists that purchasing extra fluoride
Is the only salvation
From a mouthful of cavities
I claim he is a sadistic dentist
Who only thrives
On the shrill cries of his patients
Then we come to an impasse
And when no one is looking
I run off with those neat dinosaur toys
Reserved for the younger victims